03.31.10

RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES:
Students Seek To Get High Legally.

Well this is a sorry state of affairs. Are today's youth that unmotivated? Back in my day we hijacked a bush plane and flew to Columbia with a pocket full of stolen water balloons and Ex-Lax to get high.

03.30.10

Do you think wearing my clogs to the office is inappropriate?

No. I mean, unless they clash with your sweatpants.

03.29.10

In these tough economic times...
I will give FIVE WHOLE DOLLARS to the next person who has a baby and names it ROY.*

*Birth Certificate and Social Security card required proofage!
** Also, this picture has nothing to do with anything, except when I look at if for a long time it kind of makes me sick.

03.26.10

Things I learned today:
1. If you eat 10,000 chicken wings you’ll have an $800 bar tab.
2. You can wear a mock turtleneck & polo shirt (simultaneously!) to work and not get sent home.
3. Making fun of your boss’ forehead pimple... bad idea.
4. These are potatoes…

03.25.10

AHHEM!
Do you see the gentleman behind me? Yes? For a caffeinated drink and a brownie I will gladly snap his suspenders and give him a Wet Willy. Do we have a deal here, or are you wasting my time?

03.24.10

Rub a dub dollar,
Three men in a trawler,
And who do you think they be?
The Tower, the rower,
The propane flame thrower?

03.23.10

Confectionery (con·fec·tion·ery):noun
A 1930's term for what is commonly known today as a "Beer Cave".

03.22.10

Old-Fashioned Remedies.

FOP: Hey dad, what's that trick for making it so your hands don’t’ smell like onions?
SlvrFx: Gloves.

03.19.10

Dude, your stamen is dusty.
Happy Weekend.

03.18.10

In my opinion if you are going to go ask the neighbors if you can borrow a cup of sugar AND a cup of flour, I think you may as well just cut to the chase and borrow a cup of cake.

03.17.10

FOP: Um Dad, what’s up with the… ensemble?
SlvrFX: I think says “Irish Immigrant”.
FOP: I think it says “Creepy leprechaun.”
SlvrFX: I’m just trying to celebrate my heritage, don’t ruin it.
FOP: You’re not Irish.
SlvrFX: Well, I can drink like I am.
FOP: Touché.

03.16.10

Pop Quiz!
On a scale of 1 to 10 (1 being Cher on her Farewell Tour. 10 being Lady Gaga) how do you rank the gaudiness of the items in this photo?
1. Earrings ____
2. Sea-Monster Blue Formica Counter top ____

03.15.10

Honah Lee, 1974? REMEMBER!!! You frolicked in the autumn mist?
DUDE THAT WAS OFF THE HOOK... But man, what was up with you and that little Jackie Paper dude?

03.12.10

A DIY WEEKEND!
In an attempt to be more environmentally conscientious, Bart and Darlene used eco-friendly materials to cover the windows of their new Meth-House instead of the industry standard aluminum foil.

03.11.10

TWO THINGS THAT MAY BE CONSIDERED INAPPROPRIATE:
1."I have a life size cardboard cut-out of Merlin Olsen in my garage... don't ask me why."
2. See above.

03.10.10

FOP: Um, I don't think we should go there.

SlvrFox: Some of the best huntin' around is over there.

FOP: I don't think it's safe.

SlvrFox: Safer than driving a Toyota.

FOP: DAD! WE ARE IN A CAMRY!!!

SlvrFox: How much you weigh?

FOP:...

03.09.10

Consider your Ivories' tickled.

Shame on you Lois! Requesting Three 6 Mafia at this piano bar???
Could you please limit your artists to Billy Joel and Tori Amos!

03.08.10

It's choose your own lame caption day!!!!

1. Shake Ya Tailfeather Son
2. Baby Got Aflac
3. Moby Duck
4. Does this color make my butt look big?

03.05.10

Can you keep up, turn the beat up!
She rocks the party that rocks the body!
Happy Birthday Ladyfox.

03.04.10

Deep Thoughts...

Every time I drive by The Mad Greek I wonder if they mean CRAZY Mad OR ANGRY Mad. Either way that Greek is probably “mad” because no one really knows how to pronounce GYRO.

Poor Greek.

03.03.10

We are experiencing some technical difficulties at FOP HQ.

03.02.10

CRAP!
The FOP interweb is broken.


I think IT guy, spilled stew on the server, hold tight.

03.01.10

Of these three men…
Only one claims to be Vin Diesel’s intellectual stunt double AND the Secret Love Child of Pierce Brosnan and Alec Baldwin.