08.29.11

And I Repeat
I don't care if it's imported from Alaska, Japan or the Fifth moon of JUPITER!!
Or if it has been tenderized by the tiny stomping feet of forest nymphs.
It is totally obnoxious to use the office microwave to cook this.

06.30.11

COMEBACK!

Goldie: Your photography skills aren't worth my time.

FOP: You smell like wet dog.

06.06.11

The Scoop.
Could somebody please clean out the litter box... er the kitty pool... uh, those better be pine cones.

02.23.11

Feline Farmerblow
Um, not to be rude, but your cat has some... salivary issues.

07.08.10

I like my wine like I like my cats: Bound, gagged and in a box.
Happy Weekend y’all.

06.02.10

Hey Cats! This is better than Fancy Feast!
TURTLES!!!
The new trend in litter box technology.

09.17.09

FOP FAIR WEEK
Although its odor is pungent, the elusive Carnie is a majestic creature and full of surprises. I will visit his City of Fun anytime.

09.04.09

41 Years later and they still laugh at each other’s farts.

Congrats you crazy kids.

07.17.08

Sometimes I wonder how so many beautiful things in nature can smell like cat pee.

06.20.08

HEE-HAW WEEK: DAY #5
Mountain man’s Booty Call causes mass hysteria amongst beaver population.

04.29.08

FRESH SUSHI. U-PICK! SO GOOD!
One on left just ate couch. One on right ate wife.
Cash only. No returns, exchanges, refunds.
Have happy days.

09.24.07

"Does my breath smell funny?"

"If by 'funny', you mean a helper monkey just licked the bottom of the trash can next to Space Mountain and then crawled in your mouth and died? Then yes, your breath smells 'funny'.