08.04.10

Psst!
It appears as though your... Ahem, barn door... is uh... Open.

04.26.10

ARE YOU READY TO GET PUMPED?
ARE YOU READY FOR REAL ULTIMATE POWER?
ARE YOU READY FOR TOTAL AVIAN DOMINATION!
PREPARE YOURSELF FOR….
BIRD NINJA!!!

11.02.09

Post Halloween Clean Up...

LDFX: You can put that on the shelf behind the Christmas Decorations.
FOP: MOM! You use the same bowl of candy corn every year?!?
LDFX: Of course, no one really likes that crap.
FOP: HOW LONG HAVE YOU HAD THIS BOWL OF CANDY CORN?
LDFX: Hmm. Remember the year you dressed up as Rainbow Brite?
FOP: 1984?!?!?!
LDFX: Or was it JEM & The Holograms
FOP: Sigh…

10.06.09

Barnyard Week: Day #2
Mom was totally pissed about the piercing… I hope she doesn't find out where this chain goes.

10.05.09

Dear FOP-

Are you going to have Barnyard Week this year?

— Sheepless in Seattle

______________________


Dear Sheepless

Did Colonel Sanders put potatoes, corn, coleslaw, chicken AND gravy AND CHEESE into ONE BOWL and call it a fine dining?

-FOP

09.11.09

Whatcha doin'?

Oh, you know, watchin' paint dry.

That so? How long you been here?

87 years.

08.21.09

I think that scrap of burlap and those leather straps really tie the room together.

08.04.09

A Lesson in Probability: The Monte Hall Problem

Suppose you're on a game show, and you're given the choice of three doors:
Behind one door is old lawnmower parts; behind the other, goats. You pick a door number 1, and the host, who smells like cigarettes and cheap beer, opens another door, say number 3, which has a rusted out Thunderbird. He then says to you, ``Do you want to pick door number 2?''

Is it to your advantage to switch your choice?

05.21.09

What’s up?
You know,
Lookin’ good.
Makin’ smellyass cheese.
Gnawin’ some string.

02.02.09

PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pa. - The world's most famous llama found some green shit in between his teeth Monday morning, predicting this already cold-ass winter will last for six more weeks. *

*I KNOW! I KNOW, it’s a family site. Pardon the expletives!

12.14.08

"The 12 Days of FOPFestivus"
Day 3: I’m not sure how to tell If they are French... But there’s 3 of them.

06.13.08

Due to an “incident” involving, an ox cart, a drunk cowboy and a clogger, I am forced to abandon my post a tad early today.
Happy weekend…


Pictures forthcoming, to be sure

02.04.08

Did you make the Ground Hog Day party this weekend?

Hells yeah. It was off the hook dogg.

Doode, I heard Phil was totally wasted.

Man, my boy was rippin’ it up on the dance floor. Couple shots and he’s all getting’ down with his bad-self.

Speaking of, has anybody seen Phil lately?

Uh, last time I saw him he was “Bringing Sexy Back” allover the front lawn…

08.06.07

Dagnammit Jessop!
I done think the horses are playing with Ouija Board again.