04.04.12

A fairy riding a pink unicorn sent me a note written in glitter that this flower bloomed for me today.
Obviously there's some pretty enchanting s#*t going on here at FOP H.Q.

04.03.12

Smokin' weed.

03.30.12

Well, this is awkward.
Uh, I found your book about Sacagawea.

03.29.12

Leroy! Mama done says you gots to water the lawn before goin' gator huntin'!

03.28.12

Uh, it's a Booty Wall... Baby?

03.27.12

UPGRADE NOW!
Tis the season for nest augmentations!

03.26.12

This is a tube to an air compressor...
An air compressor that I am currently using to hose out my allergy-infested sinuses.

03.23.12

Spring Clean!
With this retro Swiffer!

Happy weekend.

03.22.12

This is probably how I will nourish myself for the next 2 weeks. After which I will become them new spokesman for DIABEEEETUS!

Move over Willford.

03.21.12

Johnny Five is ALIVE!
And dudes got some crud in his eyes.

03.20.12

Welcome Spring.

03.16.12

It appears as though your bud is cloven.

Weekend. Yeah!

03.15.12

It's Tiller Time!

Ba Dum Ching.

03.14.12

3.1459

A educated man once told me, "Math, it's just a feeling... about numbers."*†


* This man also believes that if one runs a 6 minute mile, it equates to 6 miles per hour.

† Yes thats a 1979 Sony Hobo Trinitron. I am poor.

03.13.12

Bury under an inch of soil in early spring, and in 6 to 8 weeks you can bury them under your mashed potatoes!

03.12.12

Tripwire.
Cow Pie Explosion.

03.09.12

Happy Day Light Saving Weekend!
To celebrate I'll probably show up and hour late to work!

03.08.12

Where does it hurt?

You know doc, it feels like someone shot me in the chest.

03.06.12

I love this lady... even the gristly parts!

Somebody give the birthday girl some chicken-necks already!

03.05.12

And in other news.

FOP: What's up mom?
LdyFx: I'm eating chicken necks.
FOP: .... why?
LdyFx: well, I just finished exercising,
FOP:....
LdyFx: and they say you should eat protein after you workout.
FOP: Oh, Silly me.

03.02.12

Uhhh... YOUR LATE!

03.01.12

Just so you know. These make perfect oranges for your Barbie.

02.29.12

A Leap Day to remember...

You will all now suffer from night terrors for the rest of your lives.

02.28.12

Shovels, horseshoes and spiders... Oh my!

02.27.12

MAN v TRANSFORMER

Hey man, where did the rest of our ladder go?
I dunno man, we need to ask for raises if they are only going to give us half a ladder.


PS. YES, there are two men on that ladder.

2.24.12

The Chocolate, it"s a little orange or something.
I was informed that this looks more like a Butternut Bisque Fountain.

Happy Dipping.

02.23.12

The elusive Tea Frog.

02.22.12

Everyone, CHILL OUT... on this sea of tranquility... er lake?

02.21.12

Meanwhile in Utah...

So its kind of like an acoustical version of Mardi Gras... but with less booze & beads... and no boobies.

02.17.12

Have a lovely weekend.

02.16.12

Um, No. Thank You?

02.15.12

Tied up and Twisted the way I'd like to be...

Thats for all you undercover Dave Matthews fans out there....
Who are probably all fervently filling in their calendars with his 2012 tour dates.



SaaaaaatellllllllLLITES!

02.14.12

Me (and my cats) wish you a Happy Valentines day!

02.10.12

Eat your heart out Jane Goodall
I love how this image makes you think I'm blogging from a rain forest, all "Gorilla's in the Mist" style.
When really, I'm just wasting company time, not doing TPS reports, all "Office Space" style.

02.09.12

Your roots are totally showing.

02.08.12

A self-proclaimed wise-man once told me...
"Cats are kind of like bums. Always jumping out at people and pissin' on lamp posts."

I don't know if I agree, but it made me laugh.

02.07.12

A tip from Mr. Silverfox
"If you would like to exude sophistication and be acknowledged by elite circles of rich and famous people, transfer your Wal-Mart brand olive oil into a decorative bottle."

02.03.12

Nature's Granola
Its what I imagine Shredded Wheat tastes like.

02.02.12

Six More Weeks?

Hey Phil, I hear you saw your shadow!
Why don't we try just "Six Weeks of Winter"? This year I think the "more" seems a bit presumptuous.

02.01.12

If there's a downspout problem, Yo, I'll solve it!
Watch this carbide bit while my Makita revolves it.

01.31.12

The end of January always makes me sad...
So does the beginning...
Along with the 29 days in between.

01.30.12

Papa Core Shot
With an array of healing qualities, this rare material can only be found in the ears of unsuspecting smurfs.

01.27.12

I [heart] weekends.

01.26.12

Seasonal Affective Disorder?
Sit in front of this for 5 minutes and you'll probably still feel pretty hopeless.

01.25.12

In case you were wondering what a one-legged fly does on a wednesday... It goes for a ride on the hood of my car.

01.23.12

Remember when...

If the log rolls over we'll all be dead!
This joke was hilarious... in 1987.

02.20.12

Jesus on my tortilla.
Virgin Mary on my cheese toast.
Vishnu in my cabbage.

01.19.12

When I go to lunch, I like to think this little bobble reminds the gas station cashier of what a classy person I am

01.18.12

The Elusive Mountain Troll.

01.17.12

My cones are spectacular.