04.12.07

Freak Warren, I said SNOWCONES!!!
SnowCones would be fun to sell at “The-Days-of-47-Miracle-Handcart-Stadium-of-Pioneers-Pageant.”
NOT SnowSTONES!!!
I don’t even know what the crap is a SnowStone is. You’re fired.

04.11.07

Daddy told me not to worry because they’d find a cure for Emo by the time I went to high school.

04.10.07

Some humps, some humps, some humps,
Some lovely painted bumps.
I’m gonna show show show you chunks,
Rounded hunks of rusted junk.

Okay, now everybody shimmy!

04.09.07

4OP PSA:

This is your brain.

This is your brain...
on a table…
after a shot of Ouzo…
and 12 hours with the Silverfox.

Any questions?

04.06.07

When defrosting the traditional Easter rabbit, never use the microwave, it par-cooks the ears and makes them a tad chewy.

04.05.07

Gimme a one. Gimme a two. Gimme a three.
I know you laugh when you asparagus pee!

04.04.07

Warning: You may piddle your pants after seeing this…
HOLY FREAKING CRAP.
IT’S A REAL FREAKING HOBO!!!

04.03.07

First.
If you have a NicFit just before getting out of your car, I will probably document the aftermath and post it on the interweb.
Second.
Although I am not a smoker, I AM fairly certain it is against the law for a grown man to smoke this brand of cigarette.

04.02.07

In a recent study, the Pleasure Quotient™ associated with “watching grass grow” was found to be EQUAL to that of Phil Collins and Genesis announcing their 2007 Turn It On Again tour.

03.30.07

Sometimes I sit here and I think to myself, “Why does it smell like a urine-soaked mattress?”

03.29.07

Okay I’m gonna need y’all to get in straight line and wait patiently ‘til I come ‘round and pound your head in with this hammer. All righty then, let’s get started.

03.28.07

Constructed during the Beer Bong Revolution (c.1985-1999), this extravagant piece of architecture became the birthplace of the Flowmaster 3000, a radical innovation in ADS (alcohol delivery systems) technology.

03.27.07

Um, is it just me, or does this water smells like cholera?

03.26.07

4OP presents the first in a series of photos entitled:
“What the hell is it? NO, I ain’t touchin’ it, YOU touch it. Oh man I can’t believe you actually touched it!!! There’s no way I’m giving you a ride home.”

03.23.07

That’s a wrap: Awesome Show, Great Job!
Lets meet up next week for some more thought provoking imagery.
Ummmkay, Bub-bye now!

03.22.07

Silver & Ladyfox have found that looking at people through the stem of their Boozeware™ is more fun than paying the VISA bill.

Boozeware™ is a registered trademark of Four O'Clock Photo Inc. All rights reserved.

03.21.07

In her dissertation entitled “Hitchhiker v. Hobo: Can’t we all just get a long?” Dr. Von Kippen ultimately concludes the difference between a “hitchhiker” and a “hobo” can be reduced to two equally important yet opposing components.

03.20.07

Eb-dee eb-dee eb-dee ebdee.
That's all... SPOKES!

Ugh, sorry.

03.19.07

On a more serious note, a sighting of such a rare species especially outside of captivity is extremely rare.
I consider myself to be truly blessed.

03.16.07

“Let's see, there's marshmallow hearts, moons, stars, clovers, horseshoes, pots of gold, rainbows and red balloons, all magically fortified with 12 vitamins and minera… Whaaa? NO, you can’t get leprosy if you touch my beard!”

03.15.07

Me: Hey dad! What’s for dinner?
Silverfox: Beans.
Me: It's good to be home.
SF: Get your own spoon.

03.14.07

Nip it in the bud?
Ummmmm, I'm pretty sure that's against the law...except for maybe in Colorado City... and Arkansas.

*Totally worth the wait huh?
__________________________________________

SURPLISE! NO PICTURE!!! TOOT TOOT!
Um, well Big Brother Blogger is having issues posting pictures today, which makes keeping a PhotoBlog somewhat complicated. So just hold tight, while we here at FOP Headquarters go beat the poop out of whoever's in charge. We'll try and get you another lame photo, tomorrow! You can look at last years picture on the same date here . Oddly enough it appears they were having the same problem last year.... Hmmmm

03.13.07

You know when you sit on your phone and end up leaving someone a long voicemail of your butt rustling against the seat? Well this is kind of like that, except it was a camera instead of a phone... and there's no rustling.

Okay, fine, I'm really not sure what it is, but I’ll bet it smells like Indian food.

03.12.07

Berries, yes.

Dingleberries... preposterous!!!

03.09.07

Kaleel!!! You are so moronic. If we all “spring forward” at the same time, it doesn’t mean we will travel at Warp Speed. Achieving faster-than-light propulsion requires the annihilation of matter and antimatter and then harnessing the power of the resulting explosion. Furthermore, even if FTL potential existed, do you realize the havoc time dilation would reek on people generated prior to StarDate -316184.01?

03.08.07

I dropped my keys...

there...

behind those clouds.

Poooop.

03.07.07

Dude, I told you not to ask for a nicer office, now all your spreadsheets are going to smell like ass.

03.06.07

I think a nice thing to give your mom on her birthday would be a burnt-out tin box, a giant wooden spool and a bag of wood chips, because really, who doesn't like a cool surprise on their birthday?

03.05.07

It was only when the other misfit toys gave Cheech the stink-eye, did he realize the collagen lip injections might have been a bad idea.

03.02.07

A Deluxe Apartment... and a sky.
Ba dum Ching!

03.01.07

I find the best way to relax is to lay in a hammock strung between ginourmous palm trees on a beautiful beach and listen to the water lap gently against the shoreline, while a salty breeze tousles your hair and a cabana boy rubs your feet and feeds you Lortab with gold chopsticks.

02.28.07

I think the thing I hate most about February is that I pay a months worth of rent for only 28 days.

02.27.07

Today, I’m coining the term SnowHobo.

Snow • Ho • bo (noun)
def.   Snowrider, who if by magic, appears in the back of your vehicle after stopping at a light and/or slowing down to make a turn while enroute to a ski facility. The SnowHobo is a harmless creature and typically reeks of PBR and happy grass.  

Sidebar: What am I going to wear?

Were I in high school I'd fill your locker with muffins and a note that said:
"I'd want muffin more than for you to add me to your blog ."
Then I would go home, buff out my headgear and practice talking with out a lisp.

Toot! Toot!

4OP

02.26.07

For me, hell would be a world with out dipping sauces. Cuz HOT DAMN! I do love me some condiments.

02.23.07

I dunno, I mean for a country with legalized prostitution and coffee shops that sell weed, it just seems like a light beer is a bit of a copout.

02.22.07

Yes Barnaby, your family tree is splendid. You wouldn’t mind if l collected some of the branches to use at Joe Morely’s Semi Annual weenie roast this summer?

02.21.07

Mr. T pities the fool who abuses the versatility of his jewelry.

02.20.07

'Shoore would be nice if weren't so darn cold.
Makes it purdy hard fer me ‘n my brother Zeke to pump up the Jams.

02.19.07

North! South! East! West!
Grover Cleveland is the best!

President twenty-two and twenty-four
First democrat to serve after the war.

A White House bachelor, age forty-four
Threw in the towel and married a whore.

President Cleveland!! You gotta love it.
A dude who shared his name with a muppet.

02.16.07

A Transcript from 24 Hour Fitness Locker Room

TeenGirl #1: Valentine’s is like sooo stupid.
TeenGirl #2: Yeah. Dumb.
TeenGirl #1: It’s like just gotten so commercialized.
TeenGirl #2: Way. Flowers. Chocolates… LAME.
TeenGirl #1: I think Christmas is the only sacred holiday, anymore.
TeenGirl #2: Yeah, plus the Mall stays open late
TeenGirl #1: And we get a week off school.

02.15.07

It was there, on that horizon, where I learned Pro Wrestling was fake.

02.14.07

Love through the eyes of the Silverfox:

1. People say “Clothes don’t make the man.”
Silverfox says those people obviously don’t own a ”Members Only” jacket.

2. People say they way to a woman’s heart is with diamonds.
Silverfox insists nothing says “Yo babe, I love you" like a car… or at least a piece of a car.

02.13.07

This picture is utterly stunning. The lighting. The depth. The juxtaposition of death and the idyllic implications of life & rebirth. I’ll give it to you in exchange for three mechanical pencils… and a handful of Peanut M&Ms.

02.12.07

"I bet when the Neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, 'Don't forget the thick, heavy brows.' Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman."

02.09.07

Skywalks always reek of urine. What's up with that?

02.08.07

These sunglasses aren’t gay… I think they kind of make me look TOUGH, like the other dude from Wham!
You know, the one who wasn’t George Michael.

02.07.07

I know you've always wondered how they get the strobe light to work at the annual "Grizzly Adams/Robin Williams Mountain Man Rendezvous!"

02.02.07

HEY EVERYBODY!
This is Phil’s slightly overweight and underappreciated brother, Punxsutawney Larry.

2.01.07

Cold. Weathered. Overexposed...
Similar to Paris Hilton, well, minus the crabs.