07.31.13

Dude, not to be rude, but your corn smells like nursing home and litter box.

07.30.13

Oh, hey there... It's hard to believe you didn't hear me coming.

05.29.13

DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF!

This weekend, the Silverfox taught me how to properly lock up my stuff.

07.26.13

Please make sure your insects are in their full upright position.
Happy Weekend!

07.25.13

FOP Eavesdropping

Random dad's excuse for why the family pet (Mr. SnuffleBottoms) can' t "come out to play"...to a 3 year old.
" Uhhh, Sometimes cats get shot."

09.23.13

To whomever managed to smuggle BOLT CUTTERS into the locker room at my gym and proceed to dig thru my dirty unmentionables to steal my wallet...
I just wanted you to meet my family.


BOLT CUTTERS GUYS!!!!
Hood-life 4-eva!

07.19.13

Um, I believe this is what they call "the crack of dawn."

07.18.13

Flash.
Flood.

07.17.13

Nom! Nom! Nom! Nom!
Leaves n' sh*t, it's whats for dinner!

07.16.13

Dem Teefs.
Like do you even floss?

07.15.13

Partly cloudy w/afternoon sprinkles.

07.12.13

Photobombs Away!

I got a bogie at 12 o'clock!

07.11.13

What's your favorite 7/11 treat?
Mine is Mountain Dew.


Waaka waaka waaka!

07.10.13

If you listen closely you can hear an ornery middle-aged man yelling at the neighbor kids to, "STOP DOING SPARKLERS IN HIS DRIVEWAY!"
Let freedom ring!

07.09.13

TOOT! TOOT!
Attention shoppers, we have a "Last Nephite Special" on aisle 3.
Hurry! This great deal will only last until Lamanites find out!

07.08.13

I pelican't believe its Monday.

07.03.13

No, REALLY, I love what you've done to make your car PATRIOTIC. YEAH AMERICA!
But... I think we both know it needs a tad more eagle.

06.02.13

BUCK-LE UP, IT'S THE LAW!
Due to their repulsive odor, traditional deer markings will soon be replaced by a more modernized, less glandular version.
When reached for comment, the spokesdeer responded with a blank stare.

07.01.13

SKIN CANCER BE DAMNED!
Throwing caution to the wind, Nemo spent a majority of his afternoon basking in the summer sun.